Deadpool first appeared in early 1991, in Marvel Comics. He was initially introduced as a villain but as time passed, he grew into his antihero persona that we all know and love. My-I mean -his backstory is simple. Crappy childhood, got involved with the wrong people, started killing people for fun. Well you know what they say, if you’re good at something, never do it for free. That’s how he became a hired gun. Then I -he met the woman of his dreams, spent countless hours boinking each other (Jeez okay, we’ll keep it PG-13) and then he died.
No wait, he didn’t die. He got cancer, and instead of ending up in remission, he got super healing powers.
Alright, screw it. I can’t keep up the charade any longer. It’s me. I’m Deadpool, writing about my favourite topic, myself. Redwolf convinced me to write this in exchange for a couple dozen chimichangas and I couldn’t say no to chimichangas. While you’re here, go check out their Official Collection of Deadpool (Yay, me!) Mobile Covers. Why? Because I said so.
What else can I say about me? I’m awesome. I’m hot AF... or I was. But as long as the mask stays on, we’re good. I’m a man of many talents..and names. Deadpool, Wade Wilson, Merc With a Mouth, That Incredibly Cool Guy, Dude With Supercool Powers. Man, these fans really do love me, huh?
Alright fine, I’ll answer a question I get a lot. “Oh Deadpool. What skin care routine do you follow?” Well, it’s simple really. A little bit of ‘i-will-whoop-you-if-you-ask-me-that-again’, a smidge of ‘tears-of-my-enemies’ and a whole lot of ‘IDGAF’.
Alright, now I’m bored. I’m gonna go find some bad guys to pulverize. See ya. Oh and before you go, you have to check out Redwolf’s collection of Official Deadpool Mobile Covers. Why would you not want it? It’s me! You love me!